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Are You Putting New Wine in Old Wineskins?

Are You Putting New Wine in Old Wineskins?

 

Let’s talk about setting goals, failing to achieve them, and a spiritual coaching tool that can help!

Following the lead of Michael S. Hyatt, I reviewed 2016 and set goals for 2017 that, if achieved, would likely make me feel that I’d had the Best Year Ever. Believing I should, I set a fitness goal based on my intellectual understanding that, although I’m active, trim, and healthy, I had to exercise X times per week for cardiovascular conditioning, regulating blood-sugar, and strength training. At the end of the first quarter, I’d utterly failed to get near the goal and I sought input to help me get on track. I rejected all the suggestions because they didn’t excite me.

I realized I had a limiting belief—that I don’t like to exercise unless it’s just for fun like tennis or snorkeling. I’d built in flexibility and triggers to remind me, and I’d brainstormed ways to try to make it more fun. But the goal didn’t excite me—even fulfilling it sounded more like discipline than enjoyment, let alone elation about it being the best year. I was stuck. My heart didn’t buy into it. In prayer, the Holy Spirit + Creativity led me to know what would excite me. The solution: I revised my goal accordingly and have now been happily meeting my new fitness goal: Get endorphins going for at least 20 minutes of vigorous movement X times a week so I start to love that feeling!

Have you got any goals that need reframing?

Not surprisingly, my physical-psychological challenge tied into what’s been happening in my family and spiritual challenges.

It’s about not trying to put a patch of unshrunk cloth on an old garment or into a vintage quilt, because the patch will pull away from the old cloth, resulting in a worse tear. It’s about not putting new wine into old wineskins or they’ll burst, the wine will pour out, and the wineskins will get ruined. [See Matthew 9:16-17.] We need to put new wine into fresh wineskins—new ideas, reframes, revised expectations, and a new way of living out our calling—all are asking for new containers, new constructs, and fresh viewpoints. The “same old” just doesn’t work. “Because we’ve always done it that way” isn’t wise reasoning.

 

 

 

 

 

Parenting an almost teen, like our grandson who’ll be 13 in October, requires our daughter (his mom) to use a different approach than when her son was younger. How we relate to her has had to change accordingly.

Our other daughter (in the overalls above) earned a Masters in Art and Ecology this month, right after we went to see her interactive thesis exhibition in which family members shared outdoor experiences (on April 30th with  snow that morning in Albuquerque). One experience (shown here) involved hiking into a wildlife preserve with a unique backpack our daughter made (along with other models) and washing each other’s hands, which was symbolic and moving, then later sharing a meal carried in another of her special backpacks. Definitely new and different art and experiences.

Also this Spring I presented a Lenten Day of Reflection on the 5 Keys to Freedom in Christ, base on Unbound healing and deliverance prayer ministry. It’s a brand new ministry in the San Francisco area, though it’s been growing in other states and countries. The Holy Spirit orchestrated that opening, and from it, we now have a dedicated team of trained women as well as priests referring people to us and lay people eager to know more and come to us for prayer and more training. The ministry (that is, God, through a certain prayer model) heals and transforms people in a way that takes them out of their old skins of discouragement, hopelessness or depression, bad habits, the bitterness of unforgiveness, and so forth, so they can experience the new skins of freedom and life to the full that Christ intended. I’m very involved in ongoing team development and feeling invigorated and enthusiastic.

Extending the metaphor, even my latest 2017 quilt was inspired by a something old (a vintage quilt), but changed enough so I now consider it as a new wine in a new skin! The original was a small mostly handstitched crazy quilt (left or top) and mine is a bed-sized machine-stitched rendition.

Quilt by Chris Boersma Smith, Inspired by an antique crazy quilt seen as Restaurant Nora in DC

Are there areas of your life where it seems the old wineskins aren’t ready for the new wine of your life? Take stock and take heart. Remember to sow holy boldness into the art of your daily living and your goals! Also, try taking absolutely everything to prayer. And maybe, like me, it would help to break your goals into small actions that are challenging, doable with effort, and exciting to your heart and soul!

However, if you’re really stuck, consider if there is a spiritual reason, maybe even a subtle tactic or scheme of Satan, that’s keeping you where you are. If so, 5 Keys to Freedom in Christ prayer ministry, or just reading Unbound by Neal Lozano could be your Get Out of Jail Free card!

Has Your Creativity Ebbed When You Want It to Flow?

Has Your Creativity Ebbed When You Want It to Flow?

Pondering Priorities and Piercing Perfectionism Turned the Tide

When I learned to sew, my mother instilled in me excessive concern about how each garment would look inside out. My seam ripper became the most used tool in my sewing kit. I’d rip and re-do a seam or a line of topstitching almost as often as it took to make the right side and wrong side perfect.

But this week I completed a 76” x 76” quilt and entered it into a show even though it was far from perfection. And I’m as happy with its imperfections as I am with how it’s re-ignited my passion for quilting, which had smoldered for a few years.

 

With this very time-consuming quilt, From Nora’s to the Crash Pad, I designed and sometimes cut or sewed in peaceful silence (part of my Reap As You Sew approach to spiritual quiltmaking). Because this was a LONG project, I also listened to some audiobooks while I did the more repetitive tasks (such as pressing yards of pre-washed fabrics, adding a slow decorative stitch over certain “ditches” between borders, and hand-stitching the binding and hanging sleeve). Among the audiobooks was The Road Back to You, a book about the Enneagram, a personality assessment tool I’ve benefitted from since 1989 and utilized extensively in my training as a spiritual director. The Enneagram dates back to the fourth century and is a spiritual tool as much as a psychological one. It sets forth nine personality types, with many, many variations and nuances that help you know your strengths, weaknesses, tendencies, and approaches to life. I am a No. 1, the Idealist or Perfectionist, so you see how this ties into the seam ripper!

What I love about the Enneagram is that it doesn’t pigeonhole me and leave me there. Rather, it makes me aware of how I typically respond to stress (I withdraw and become more like a No. 4, the Romantic, like Mary Magdalene) or to feeling secure (moving toward No. 7, the Enthusiast, like The Woman at the Well). It helps me understand how I challenge my husband or kids when I’m imposing unrealistic standards, being critical, or listening too much to my Inner Critic. Armed with awareness, I’m better able to get around my pitfalls, to recognize and renounce my demons.

 

Surprise 1:   The  Imperfect Attracted Me Most

From Nora’s to the Crash Pad began with a romantic dinner at Restaurant Nora when I accompanied my husband on a business trip to DC in 2015. We practically missed our dinner when our flight was delayed, but we were determined to go there even when we didn’t land until almost 9 pm. Nora’s had been our favorite splurge when we were dating in the early 80s, and my husband used to save up for visits there about once every other month. When we walked in now, decades later, the part of me who became a quilter about ten years into our marriage was thrilled to see the walls adorned with an impressive and varied collection of antique quilts.

 

Of all the quilts, the one opposite my seat was the one that inspired my newest quilt. After the diners who sat beneath it had left, I went up close to admire and photograph it. I was stunned to see how wonky it was: the decorative stitches you’d find on old crazy quilts were irregular. The seams were in odd places. The shapes weren’t uniform. The fabrics were inconsistent. Points of triangles were cut off. Straight lines were out of alignment. And there was embroidery in some places, not balanced by similar embroidery where it would be expected. I was charmed! I decided to make something like it for a bed quilt for our San Francisco apartment, which we call “the crash pad” since our principal residence is 110 miles north along the coast.

I’d learned over and over (but still tend to forget) how being perfectionistic can help me or hurt me. Perfectionism helps me when I remember to strive for excellence rather than unattainable perfection, and it’s served me well in academic and professional circles. But it hurts or hinders me when I procrastinate rather than doing a job that I fear won’t meet my standards. It’s awful when it gets in the way of loving acceptance and honoring other people’s approaches, when it harms my relationships. I’m sorry to say that it’s been the source of many a disagreement with my husband, who is not a perfectionist. (Fortunately, he’s let me train him about how best to load a dishwasher.) And it was hard for my kids, who I now know felt criticized and often not good enough, just as I had growing up with my parents’ high standards.

I’m no longer addicted, but I call myself a recovering perfectionist. With Unbound prayer ministry, I renounced the lies that live in No. 1 territory: that I’m not good enough; that I must do everything myself if I want it done right; that if something’s worth doing, it’s worth doing your very best; and so on. So I brought my recovering perfectionist self to the making of From Nora’s to the Crash Pad.

 

Surprise 2:   Imperfect Beats Never Finished

Not having a pattern, I had to design and enlarge this quilt and I wanted to “fix” some of the original’s wonkiness, but I ended up with some wonkiness of my own! I appliquéd the center section together, thinking I’d cover all the mitered corners with eight radiating lines like the original had. So I didn’t worry about those miters being just so. Only later, I decided I wanted just four spokes, so some imperfect miters are left exposed. Not all my 90-degree angles are square. I got a new quilting machine with which to quilt this and didn’t have time to practice on a smaller, less important quilt first. So the quilting has many zigs or zags that wouldn’t be there on a perfect quilt. And I bought the wrong amount of backing fabric and had to choose something else from a small local offering, so the back is solid cream and it shows all the stops and starts and a little thread barf and even some blood from a cut finger. So what!? On the bed, who will care? Even hanging at the show, with the placement I got up high, the five-foot rule is automatic. No one can even see those imperfections without a giant stepladder! Had I held out for perfection, or wielded the seam ripper more than I did, this quilt might have lost not only its chances of completion in my lifetime, but the joy it gives me in the present!

 

Surprise 3:   Meeting a Challenge with Excellence Highlights Priorities

Powering through a week of almost non-stop production toward the end of this project, I felt the love of quilting again. I was delighted that I’d traded in a sewing machine I didn’t like for one I now love – even though that meant admitting that I’d made a wrong decision when I bought the other machine ten years ago. You see, wrong decisions are a significant fear and embarrassment for Ones. I had to prioritize and not even try to please everyone else as I put my creativity ahead of service, which is also unusual for a One who tends to overwork and fall short in the self-nurture category. Creativity is, for me, a top form of self-nurturance! Even when I work late into the evening, I quilt with Spirit, go to bed happy, have sweet dreams, and wake up enthused.

 

I’m excited to be going to the opening reception for the quilt show tonight, sharing it with my husband who loves this quilt. I’m delighted to have re-discovered how expressing my creativity is not a luxury but a necessity in my life! The creative process allowed me to ponder the Enneagram once again, reconsidering both how and WHY I do what I do and what I might wish to do differently. I’ll bring its insights with me into my freedom, healing, and deliverance ministry.

If you’re interested in finding out about your Enneagram type to help you identify some of your penchants and to gain personal benefits from its wisdom, I recommend reading The Road Back to You or other Enneagram books. I’ve got a library of them, and each sheds more light on the illuminating subject of how we are. I’d also recommend Unbound ministry or 5 Keys to Freedom in Christ prayer ministry to help you break through your compulsions, fears, or bad habits, and to open you to greater creativity, a process which I describe in my eBook, Freedom from Hurts, Fears, and Unhealthy Habits.

Your comments are always welcome!

7 Reasons to Let Your Light Shine through Gifts from Your Heart

7 Reasons to Let Your Light Shine through Gifts from Your Heart

I’m basking in the joy of two recent Love Trips:  a week in Mexico with my daughter Kacie, during which we finalized the design for a multi-generational wedding shawl; the other a visit to see my parents, during which my Mom and I started making that shawl. Not only is this bridal gift now in progress; I also learned a lot along the way. If you’ve been wracking your brain for a special gift idea, you know the challenge of coming up with a gift that truly shows your feelings. It could be just the time to brainstorm unique ways to honor a loved one for an upcoming occasion, whether you express your creativity in tangible or intangible ways!

Mom & I on Day One of the Wedding Shawl project, practice piece on the left.

Sometimes it can feel impossible to give a meaningful gift to someone like my husband, who has everything he cares about and wants nothing material. And what can you give an older person who’s been giving away her belongings and isn’t as active as she used to be? We’ve all faced the gift challenge with someone! But let’s move our focus from the material world to the experiential and spiritual world and see what happens.

A blessing by John O’Donahue says:

“May the light of your soul bless the work you do with the secret love and warmth of your heart; May you see in what you do the beauty of your own soul; May the sacredness of your work bring healing, light and renewal to those … who see and receive your work; May your work never weary you; May it release within you wellsprings of refreshment, inspiration and excitement; May you be present in what you do.”

I am feeling that soulful, beautiful, sacred, exciting blessing with this bridal shawl!

My mother taught me to sew from my toddlerhood! She was a sew-at-home seamstress, helping support the family by taking in dressmaking, drapery-making, and slipcover fabrication. She’d work hours a day with me standing on the back of her chair with my little hands on her shoulders watching her at the Singer. When I was a little older, she taught me hand sewing so I could make doll clothes, and then taught me to sew simple tops from patterns by 7. So it was like old times when we pulled out the white Swiss batiste, the bone-colored Radiance with cotton on the inside and silk on the outside, the silk bridal satin ribbon, and the white pearl cotton last week to measure, cut, and start sewing the shawl.

The wedding shawl was Kacie’s idea. She wants to wear something that the three other women in our immediate family put themselves into—her maternal grandmother, her mother, and her sister. It’s not decided whether she’ll wear it with her not-as-yet-selected wedding dress or will make it a part of her rehearsal dinner outfit. With bone and white, she has flexibility, and oversized shawls are her style. (This one will be 86” x 34.”) She’s a romantic artist with a love of textiles. Her fiancé Ted is sentimental and artistic, too (he’s finishing up a master’s in landscape architecture). And they’re getting married just weeks before my parents’ 70th wedding anniversary. So, coming up with creative ways to make their ceremony touching is a high priority, warming the hearts of multiple generations, reinforcing these . . .

7 reasons to let your light shine by giving creative gifts from the heart.

1. Some of our best gifts are only released when we slow down! 

My mom played golf until she turned 90 and still plays bridge, does Bible study, enjoys an active social life, and entertains often. Thank God she’s in good health except that severe scoliosis has diminished her balance. This slowed her down after some falls produced fractures that forced her to sit more. Now when I visit, I too slow down. I need and benefit from it! My best gifts flow from my morning quiet time with the Lord. My priorities for the day are set during that time, and the Holy Spirit often guides my writing, prepares me for my speaking or teaching events, and inspires me in my quilting, decorating, or other creative undertakings. During my time with my parents—and my sister who lives near them—slowing down allowed for some deep conversations and shared intercessory prayer, as well as discussions about how to make the shawl. My mom voiced her concern that her hand sewing would not be as steady and her stitches not as small and perfect as they once were.

2. Gifts from the heart will likely be received with heart, so process and message outshine perfectionism and product focus.

Kacie’s sister Brenna had wisely passed on to me a conversation she’d had with Kacie about the shawl. Accordingly, I was able to reassure my mother and myself that Kacie didn’t care about the perfection of our stitches! Once we got that cleared up and cut the shawl body and borders out, I decided to use some of the leftover fabrics for a smaller practice piece. Having a chance to practice was reassuring. Kacie had asked to have us fill the borders with sashiko-style stitches to mimic waves, a motif chosen because of our family’s coastal living. My mom’s wavy lines and mine were quite different, but once we pressed the border, we saw the lovely effect and felt free to stitch our imperfect wavy lines onto the real border! Being freed of perfectionism encouraged us to focus on the WHY and the LOVE and the HEIRLOOM nature of what we’re making, to relax and enjoy the process.

3. Collaboration allows us to connect where our kindred spirits align, which is an affirmation, a blessing, and a joy.       

As mentioned above, my mom and I have a shared our love of creative handwork, and so do Kacie and Brenna. I felt true joy while sitting on a loveseat in the warmth of my parents’ Florida lanai, with Mom stitching on the border of one end of the shawl and me stitching on the other! I was thrilled that we were doing something so meaningful together, something that unites us! I felt gratitude on so many levels: for my mother’s life, health, and happy marriage, for the sewing talent she’s shared with me, and for the understanding of how much this gift means to Kacie.

4. Infusing a gift with prayer makes it truly from the heart and soul.

My mother and I spontaneously began to pray together out loud for Kacie and Ted and their marriage as we sewed. We prayed for their wedding planning to go smoothly, for the joy of it and for the stress of that task to be dissipated, especially as the couple is currently in their final thesis semester of 3-year grad school programs. We prayed for their careers and good jobs. We prayed for their relationship and a long, happy marriage, and for them to be blessed with healthy children. And on and on. All these prayers are now stitched into that shawl, and Kacie will be wrapped in them when she wears it!

5. Flexibility in the process, especially when coordinating with multiple generations or skill levels and diverse locations, enhances a creative and cooperative approach.

I was only in Florida 4 full days this last trip, so we got a great start but there’s lots more to do on this shawl. Working on it together was far better than trying to mail the shawl cross-country with instructions about what to do! But flexibility is a must. What aspects of the project Brenna will do, what Mom did, and what I will do has changed and is not yet fully known. When I get together with Brenna to work on it, we’ll see what parts she’s most drawn to. Coordinating among family members who live in three locations demands flexibility, adding creativity and cooperation to the means of accomplishing the goal.

6. The heirloom nature of what’s being created is empowering and enlivening. 

Working on her granddaughter's wedding shawlThe impact of this gift will reverberate—now in the making, this fall in the use of the shawl during wedding festivities, and likely on to at least one future generation. I have a baby blanket that was used when my father was an infant, a flower girl dress I wore at age 2 or 3, made by my mom. As much as I like a decluttered home, those textile heirlooms and this shawl are likely to keep sparking joy and not be decluttered soon! With that expectation, the handwork enlivens us and feels like a privilege. Imagine coming generations getting to see this photo of their great- or great-great-grandmother stitching this heirloom.

Not only this shawl will leave a legacy. My father’s 40+ year career was in magazine publishing. He is a great writer and public speaker, an awesome lector proclaiming the Word at his church. He and my mom will talk about what to include in the talk he’s been requested to give at the wedding, and he will draft it, polish it, and deliver it with heart (and maybe even a tear or two)! His creativity is being honored, as well as the legacy of Kacie’s grandparents’ long and happy marriage, since their 70th anniversary is just weeks after her wedding!

7. Your best gifts, the ones that are most uniquely YOU, proceed from your gifts, talents, and life experiences. 

All our contributions were requested based on who we are and the special gifts God bestowed on each of us, and that is very empowering! If you’re looking to create a heart-touching gift with impact, start brainstorming with a look at your own giftedness (Link to a freebie for email), what makes your heart sing, your own sacred calling.

Gifts that draw on your creativity entail giving of yourself, from your heart, intended and likely to touch the recipient’s heart. This doesn’t mean every gift you give needs to be a months’ long masterpiece, like some quilts are. Maybe you love to cook and can prepare a special meal or give someone your special granola. Maybe you like to forage and can pick, dry, tuck in some recipes, and wrap up some dried porcini. Maybe you compose or sing and could record some of your music for loved ones to enjoy. (Each of our daughters has given us a CD of herself singing and I love listening to these time after time—a gift that surely keeps on giving!) A video of yourself dancing? Poetry? Ceramics? Painting?

If you don’t yet know why you’re here and where your creative genius lies, you’re not alone! The good news is that when people figure out what God intended and equipped them to do, it brings new meaning to their lives and helps them make good decisions about how they spend their time, talent, and energy, and what they have to share. If this sounds intriguing, I suggest you listen to my 20-minute recording, Discover Your Sacred Calling. If you’d like outside assistance, consider Spiritual Direction that could include ARTbundance™ or Creativity Coaching. Then use what you discover or know about your gifts and talents and let your light shine through them to bless and delight those you love! I know you can do this!

What creative gift are you making or giving to someone special?

 

How an Inspired Artist's Breakthrough Yielded Sensational Results

How an Inspired Artist's Breakthrough Yielded Sensational Results

Symphony concert for Handel Messiah

150 years after its controversial debut, Handel’s Messiah was said to have “probably done more to convince thousands of mankind that there is a God . . . than all the theological works ever written.” Let’s peek at the creation of that masterpiece to discover how you and I might use our creative gifts to serve others, sometimes by miraculous or inspired breakthroughs.

Amy Kuebelback, a liturgical musician whose writing appeared in today’s entry of Give Us This Day, reports that Handel composed this sacred work in three weeks, not leaving his house and barely eating. In other words, this wasn’t like any ordinary day’s work; composing Messiah was a breakthrough of monumental proportions! Inspired by scripture, the consoling first words of the oratorio come directly from the King James version of the Book of Isaiah, Chapter 40. As Amy puts it, “The notes of the aria paint the meaning of the words, leaping up for mountains, making jagged intervals for crooked and sustained tones for straight and plain. . . . Legend has it that after finishing the Hallelujah chorus, [Handel] sobbed at his desk and told his servant: ‘I did think I did see all Heaven before me, and the great God himself.'” Structured like an opera but without drama or speech, the prophecies of Isaiah precede the annunciation to the shepherds, based on the Gospels. Part II focuses on Christ’s Passion, ending with the “Hallelujah” chorus, and Part III covers the resurrection of the dead and Jesus’ glorification. Despite the scriptural basis of Messiah, its 1743 debut was called blasphemous because it opened in a secular theater with secular performers. However, Messiah went on to become one of the best-known and most frequently performed choral works in Western music. It has no doubt stirred many a heart and soul.

The heart is the key. Ephesians 2:10 that says we are the Lord’s handiwork, created to do good works that God planned in advance for us to do. I wonder whether George Frideric Handel was aware of his mission as a composer: to evangelize with his music for centuries! I wonder if he pondered Psalm 28 before, during, or after composing wMessiah. 

The Lord is my strength and my shield;

my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.

My heart leaps for joy,

and with my song I praise him.

~Ps. 28:7 (NIV)

Mt 9:27 ASK BELIEVINGThis Psalm assures us with bold promises: divine protection, strength, assistance and God’s super-power added to our natural gifts, resulting in exhilarating joy—as long we put our hearts into our creativity with trust in God and God’s promises. To do that, let us ask for the inspiration we need, believing it will be done for us, and giving thanks before we’ve even seen the full manifestation. Let’s create in alignment with the holy will that endowed us with our creative gifts and inclinations. This is best done by doing some prayer, meditation, or centering before we undertake our creative endeavors. 20 minutes of spiritual preparation can save many hours of trial and error!

After reading about Handel in this morning’s Quiet Time, I asked my husband to try to get us tickets to attend a San Francisco performance of Messiah this season either at the San Francisco Symphony or at Grace Cathedral. If we succeed, Hallelujah! Even if we can’t attend live, we’ll download it on iTunes. Either way, I’ll listen with my heart as open as my ears!

christ the redeemer - faith - creativity - classIf you’d like to discover more about How Faith and Creativity Connect in the Heart, you’d probably love my 90-minute seminar and workbook offered here.

 

 

5 Looks at Your Life  . . . And What You Wish It Included

5 Looks at Your Life . . . And What You Wish It Included

My husband in the experimental garden at Stone Barns, site of the Foods for Tomorrow conference we just attended.

The past ten days have been full of heart-to-heart happenings that reinforce my decision to celebrate creativity and to help other women transition to more creative living. Yesterday I loved connecting in person with creative women who came to my Sea Ranch home for a mini-retreat where we experientially addressed creativity, matters of faith, and fear as a disruptor of the creative process. On the East Coast last week I considered my call to creative living vis-à-vis five events, any one of which could spark energy for change.

 

What East Coast Experiences Persuaded Me?

  • Being with friends I’ve known for decades, hearing their stories, and explaining what I do . . . for the first time since my “transition” to authentic, Holy Spirit-directed, creative living;
  • Attending a conference with committed individuals who share a passion to work for better food policies affecting present and future generations;
  • Celebrating my mother’s birthday and reflecting on how it’s never too late to live out one’s special calling;
  • Stumbling upon an impressive obituary capsulizing the 96-year life of a  female pioneer and philanthropist in the art and publishing world, whose life reflects her curiosity and the consistent desires of her heart; and
  • Attending my husband’s Harvard 40th Reunion, where a symposium of successful Radcliffe women, while reflecting on their careers, families, and what it all meant, and also revealed their struggles and hopes for the future in light of what matters most.

The Effect of Sharing with Friends

We had dinner with a couple my husband’s known since their teens. The wife is a powerful doctor with major administrative responsibilities for multiple hospitals. Though she and her husband recently bought their dream house in the country and have an apartment they love in Manhattan, she hardly gets to either home. She’s grappling with whether to go for a promotion and work exceedingly hard for another 3 or 4 years, to stay where she is (with no time for a life outside work or even time to take vacation days she’ll lose by not taking them in 2015), or to possibly retire now at 62, which is an affordable but apparently unlikely option for them. She’s sure she’d have plenty to do without her job: postponed reading, sewing, and a creative pursuit in woodworking, which she’s longed to undertake for decades. She’s given all she has for patients and employees her whole career, frequently neglecting self-care in the process. I admire her dedication and contributions to medicine and society, and I feel sad at all she and her husband have given up for it. They’re expecting a first grandchild soon and do plan to figure out how to take care of him one day a week!

We met with a college friend of mine who started a new job in finance at age 61, at the same time his wife went into real estate, a field that had long intrigued her. These later-in-life jobs have opened up new adventures for them. After several trips to supervise service providers who report to him from Bangalore, Joe’s discovered a love of India. He appeared energized, vigorous, and full of his longstanding good humor and faith. Another couple is retired and busy with travel including a recent pilgrimage to the Holy Land, helping out and spending time with their large family including seven grandchildren under six, and they’re actively involved in multiple ministries. I helped them load their Suburban full of food so Wendy could go feed dinner at a homeless shelter they support after dropping me at the airport.

With all these friends, I felt good sharing what I’m up to, glad to have moved on from my over-achieving career days to a gentler creativity and ministry-focused life. I felt free to talk about my relationship with God in connection with how I spend my days — something I’d formerly have kept to myself. I felt natural, relaxed, and authentic — a nice change from my former self! I really related to each of these friends and how much we look for meaning and gratitude and ponder all this at our current ages.

The New York Times Food for Tomorrow Conference

I’ve been fascinated with nutrition since I had my first child 30 years ago, and this conference was a tasty treat and a mind-stretcher! Mark Bittman, Michael Moss, Dean Ornish, Paul Krugman, Steve Case, farmers, chefs, doctors, policymakers, scientists, innovators, entrepreneurs, professors, philanthropists, politicians, animal welfare activists, sustainability experts . . . these were just a few of the speakers! We learned that 30% of all food grown in this country goes to waste, while people are undernourished and good food is often unaffordable. To drive this point home, award-winning chef and author Dan Barger served us delicious and definitely innovative breakfasts, lunches, and dinner made from food waste such as bruised fruits, oddly shaped vegetables, apple and carrot peels, the foamy water from cooking chickpeas, polenta made from the corn usually fed to cattle, and a bit of goat meat. Although the focus was food, environment, health, access, and education, what grabbed me throughout were the coming together of people dedicated with passion and creativity to working for the betterment of individuals and society, now and into the future. I’m inspired to make some important changes.

Celebrating the Triumphs of Other Women Aging Gracefully

Three women’s stories have given me inspiration and hope recently. Kathie Brady had dabbled in many an art form over the years and this year found a new one that seems to truly celebrate who she is as a loving, relationship-oriented artist and woman of strong faith! You can read a short excerpt of her story in my blog post,  Can You Imagine Your Compost Pile as Creative?

Last week my Mom celebrated a birthday, less than a month after my husband and I got to host her and my dad for a nice visit in San Francisco. You can read a short tribute to her stewardship of gifts of hospitality, creativity, generosity, and evangelization in my blog post, Never Too Late for You to Live Out Your Calling.

On the plane to New York, I happened upon the not particularly prominent October 17, 2015, obituary of someone I’d never heard of but was duly impressed with: Irma Giustino Weiss, who died at 96.  The New York Times column noted that Ms. Weiss was a witty, caring “yea-sayer to life” who cared deeply about human rights as well as art, architecture, and cultural enrichment. As I read the obit, I could so easily see the common artistic, vibrant, generous thread through all she did—from where and what she studied as a young woman (Art at The Cooper Union), the jobs she held and awards she won (first female in the Art Department of Triangle Publications, two Art Director Awards for work at Ziff Davis Publishing, and Creative Director at Conde Nast Publications), the type of marriage she enjoyed (“a magical marriage, whose romance never ended”), the students (of art and architecture), causes (helping the less fortunate experience the artistic, theatrical, and cultural treasures of New York City), the institutions she supported (Cooper Union and the Whitney Museum), plus the attitudes and style she is described as bringing to it all.

Kathie, Mom, and Irma, thanks for the inspiration!

Radcliffe Women Debating Whether Women Who Graduated in the 70s Really Could “Have It All”

A panel of 1975 grads re-asked the burning Gloria Steinem-inspired question of their college years—Can Women Have It All? Interestingly, “have it all” seemed to imply “have all that successful men have traditionally had.” I have so much to say about what I heard and how my heart responded that I’m going to save this for my next blog post. Stay tuned! Or, if you want to jump into the conversation this topic suggests, feel free to comment or email me right away. I’d love to hear whatever you’d like to share on the topic!

In the meantime . . .

Look At Your Life and Ask

 

Never Too Late for You to Live Out Your Calling

Never Too Late for You to Live Out Your Calling

Today is my Mom’s birthday. From this picture of her, my dad, and me (taken last month), you can try to guess her secret age, but you’ll probably be wrong because she’s so healthy for her years. Her longevity’s a tremendous blessing and reminds me of all that you and I can do in our senior years.

For example, not only did my mom teach me to sew from my earliest years, more recently she’s loved sewing teddy bears for all the babies she knows and for charitable causes. She starts every day with prayer and daily devotions, and she’s a regular churchgoer who initiated and leads a neighborhood Bible study. She reads voraciously and loves discussing books. After years of helping out a soup kitchen weekly, she’s coordinated countless meals for people recovering from unfortunate circumstances. She has a gift of hospitality and uses it more than anyone I know to entertain with abounding grace. Besides all that, she’s a sharp bridge player! An extrovert with lots of energy, she takes great interest in her friends, relatives, husband, children, grandchildren, and great-grandchild.

My motto, which Mom exemplifies, is: It’s never too late to express your CREATIVE GENIUS or to fulfill your SACRED CALLING.

Her birthday is a reminder to ask yourself:

  • what you’re not doing that you’d like to plan or start to do;
  • how your creativity plays into your business or family life or retirement;
  • how you might improve your self-care so you’re more likely to stay active longer . . . and of course
  • what your creative genius is (because you can define it however you’d like) and
  • what your sacred calling is (because that’s your divine purpose).

If you’d like to hear it, I have a recording available on

How to Discover Your Sacred Calling. 

A great gift to me and my mom would be if you’d say a little prayer right now for her and all of our extended family. Thank you!